that doesn’t mean he’ll lose interest in you, but if he already had some insecurities about whether or not you are into him, this will stir up his insecurities further and he’ll keep doing and trying things to “make you like him” so he can feel secure. So, for starters, I would say that the more insecure he is about you liking him, the more of this stuff he’s going to say until he’s convinced that you really like him a lot.Once he believes that you really like him, it’s at that point he’ll relax and start being himself.

So from his perspective, this is a perfect situation: He still gets to be technically single but also has your ongoing exclusive commitment, sex, and companionship. So if he starts feeling pressure from you for him to get into a relationship with him, he’s going to pull back… It’s because he doesn’t want to be in a relationship…

Or if he feels that the current dynamic is feeling too much like a “relationship” to him (whatever he defines that as), he’s going to pull back. and no amount of asking, begging, hinting, pressuring or convincing is going to change that!

It can be helpful to look at the initial period of dating as it’s own phase with its own specific qualities.

MORE: Exactly Why Men Withdraw From Relationships For example, in the beginning, both of you might feel a lot of excitement and also an undercurrent of fearful restlessness.

At first, I thought he was just trying to end things, but then from time to time, he’ll text me something really sweet, like about how much he wants to see me, or that he’s been thinking about me, so obviously, he’s still interested or why would he do that?

Okay, I’m gonna let you in on something that very few women know.

He does all sorts of things to woo her and win her over, but simultaneously, he (for whatever reason) does not want to be in an exclusive relationship.

So as soon as the woman declares that she really likes him, she assumes it means that they’re headed towards a relationship.

“Dropping the mask” is something I talk about extensively in the article link below…