I think they suffer from the worst kind of limitations that any human can suffer... I really, really try to see the value in everyone, even when I feel like slapping them across their freaking faces. A version of my dad, which I never in my fricking life thought I would do (both get married and marry a guy like my dad).

Just think about the last time you spoke with someone who visited a foreign country.

My favorite example is the one about my friend who visited Paris and all she could come up with was how much it smelled, how stupid it was that they asked whether you wanted your water with gas or not and how much NOT like New York City it was. It's Paris, He could probably write a post similar to this if he was so inclined.

They never let go enough of what they think the world should be like or what people should be like.

As a result, they will never experience the pleasure of being proven so entirely wrong that they find themselves head over heels in love with the very thing they thought they would never want any part of.

I know lots of people who have been all over the world, yet because of their way of thinking, they have never really left home.

They experience the world and the people in it within a very narrow and specific frame of reference.

My reasons for asking whether a guy grew up here or not are completely different. I wish, so wish, that that wasn't such a stereotypical statement, but the desi men I've met have not yet managed to prove themselves to be different. I actually WANT to marry a desi man, and make sure that desi culture is part of my life, that my future children are going to be exposed to it, but I am absolutely not willing to turn into my husband's mother, nor am I willing to have a husband who expects that he will never have to contribute to the household.

I need to prepare myself for a certain amount of disappointment. When I hear that a boy grew up in the sub-continent, I know that the chances are good that he will have "expectations." I just got out of a relationship with an Indian boy because I could not *stand* his attitude towards women, and that's the problem I have with many Indian men. I actually *want* to marry an Indian man, for many reasons, but I CANNOT find one who shares anything resembling my values, and I actually am willing to compromise on many things.

I understand that people feel that if both people grow up in the states they will have a better understanding of each other.